Dating Mr. Know-It-All

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Arrogance is ugly. Very ugly. No one knows everything. We are all better or worse at different things, and we all know a little more or less about different things. When it comes to dating and getting to know someone, it’s imperative to have an open mind and an open ear to learn about the other person. As a wise man once said, “knowledge is power,” and there’s something new that we can learn every single day, and this never stops until the day that we die.


Nothing is attractive or appealing about a person who is so arrogant and consumed with themselves that they only want to hear themselves talk, rather than have an open mind towards getting to know another person and letting them talk and speak their mind. You can’t learn about another person or even find out whether or not you’re a good match for one another if you’re the only one doing the talking. Think about it, because you already know who you are as a person—or at least you should. But your point is to try to get to know another person, so you can tell if you’re the best possible match for one another. And the only way to do that, is to ask the right types of questions. But not so that you sound smart or intellectual, trying to impress the other person. But rather, your motive should be so that you’ll get to know the other person. So listen closely to the other person’s responses when you ask questions.


Don’t be arrogant or narcissistic and so consumed with yourself that you don’t care to ask the other person questions or find out about their interests, their likes, their dislikes, and keeping an eye open for their cute, little idiosyncrasies, and what not. The most beautiful thing about getting to know another person, is finding out who they are deep within their soul and to see how well you connect together, and on as many levels as possible—spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, and to see if you connect in other ways that perhaps you feel are important to you.


Remember this, sometimes it’s those people who tend to feel that they’re in such a good place in life, viewing themselves as completely authentic and more so, the “keep it real” types, completely whole as a person, have an amazing head on their shoulders (and they’ll most likely make sure that you know!), and know exactly what they want out of life, who might not be just as amazing as they might think. Be humble. And if being humble doesn’t come natural for you, work on it!


If someone is the only one who’s doing all of the talking and sharing all of their likes, dislikes, and letting the other person get to know them, without being concerned as much about asking questions, listening, and getting to know the other person, they’re likely arrogant or possibly even narcissistic and completely consumed with themselves. This can be incredibly selfish and an easy way to destroy what could’ve been a promising situation.


It’s great to share and be open with the person who you’re dating, so that they can truly get to know you. And it’s definitely imperative to be as authentic and as genuine as you possibly can. But like I said before, you need to get to know the other person and focus on learning all about them, and not just have them get to know you and all about everything that you like. Let go of your ego, and be confident, but not arrogant. Focus more on becoming selfless, loving, and kind. Let that kindness show through your actions and words, starting with how well you listen, and care to learn about the other person.

Anne Cohen
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