Why Physical Attraction Is Not Enough


It’s important to have some idea of what you want in a match. We all look for different things, and we all pretty much hope to find many of those things in a person before we’re willing to explore a relationship with them. Whether a person is looking for great chemistry or someone tall, or whether great looks is the last thing on their mind, and they’re perhaps more of the sapiosexual type, you need to know what you want in a partner, and what drives you the most.


Knowing what you want in a partner is easy if you really think about it. I don’t really understand all of the people who say that they don’t know what they want, and many people even write it their online dating profiles. I mean, it’s not a very appealing thing when you don’t know what you want in life or in a partner. It shows lack of thought, desire, passion, and decisiveness.


In life, it’s important to know what you want, because that’s saying that you have goals of some sort. When it comes to knowing what you want in a partner, it’s important to know what you like and what you don’t like. Many times people say that they’ll know what they’ll like when they see it. On the contrary, if you don’t know your tastes, and you don’t have any opinions on what you view or value as important to have in a partner, you’re probably not in a good position to be dating anyone.


Superficial Love


One things holds some truth, and is at least somewhat understandable, and that’s the fact that not everyone knows what they want their partner to look like. Good looks can only get you so far in a relationship. Physical attraction is important, but many times it’s not even routed from an exterior physical beauty. At least, not when you have a pure soul.


It’s important to be with someone that you’re attracted to, essential even. However, attraction can come from many different things, and not simply physical beauty alone. You might actually be surprised at how many people seem like such odd couples because one of them is so incredibly attractive, whereas the other person would be considered below average in physical beauty.


Relationship should be based on a solid, strong foundation that should have nothing, and I mean nothing to do with physical beauty. When you’re old and gray, and your partner or someone else asks you why you love them, if you have any trace of an authentic and beautiful soul, you’re not going to be happy with the response of “because you’re beautiful.” We all want to know that our partner loves us because it’s genuine, real, and because of who we are deep inside. Don’t get me wrong, because we all want to know that our partner finds us attractive, but that should really be just the icing on the cake.


Many failed marriages take place because someone ends up with a partner, because they were so physically attracted to them and their beauty. I’ve met a tremendous amount of people that had such exquisite exterior beauty. But it was merely skin deep, and once I got to know their character, I was quite turned off, even on a friendship level. You definitely can’t read a book by its cover, and there’s nothing more beautiful and appealing than the depth of a person’s soul. That’s what we should fall in love with.


Don’t waste your time with someone who you’re attracted to on a superficial level. Get to know a person’s depth, and give things a real chance. Physical beauty is nothing at the end of the day. It can’t provide a deep and meaningful relationship, a life full of laughs, or a warmth that will last a lifetime. Knowing a person’s depth takes time, patience, good intentions, and a genuine desire to find something meaningful.  

Anne Cohen

Founder, Owner, Writer, and Editor at Anne Cohen Writes
Anne Cohen is a lifestyle and relationship blogger based in Los Angeles, CA. Her blogs are Anne Cohen and Anne Cohen Writes. She contributes to various publications including The Huffington Post, Elite Daily, and many more. She's passionate about love, writing, chess, and more than anything, her two kids.

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