A Final Confession



I’m the luckiest guy on Earth. And here’s why…

At one point in my life, I was fortunate enough to meet the one woman on this planet who was meant for me alone, but due to circumstances beyond my control, I lost her. For a long time after that, I never thought I’d find anyone who came close to making me feel the same way. I didn’t think it was even remotely possible. Meeting your soulmate is a statistical impossibility; having it happen twice is… I don’t know. Is there a word greater than impossible? If there is, I can’t think of it.

But I did.

She looks at me as though I’m the greatest guy on the planet. She doesn’t judge me, supports me no matter what, and thinks I walk on water practically. And to be honest, I’ve never understood why. But it’s enough to know she does.

What she inspires in me, I almost can’t describe it. Sometimes I feel as though a force beyond myself is guiding me when I write. It makes me want to create beauty in a place where there was only anger, bitterness, and pain before. It makes me want to change the world with my words.

I know I can do anything as long as she’s with me. And knowing that is the most amazing feeling ever, there are no words to express it. Everything I’ve written so far is just a pale reflection of what I’m holding back in my heart. But I know where that kind of love comes from. The same place I see when I look in her eyes….

… Heaven.

She may drive me absolutely crazy sometimes, but it’s the kind of crazy that makes me laugh and gives me butterflies in my stomach. It’s the kind of crazy where I may become annoyed with her for five seconds and then love her even more than I already do, if that’s possible. She might not even see all the things in herself that I do. The kinds of things no one either notices or cares about; they’re the little things that when you add them all up, make her perfect in a way a diamond could only dream of.

I may not think I’m worthy of such an amazing woman, but she makes me feel like I am. And though I’ve made many mistakes in my life, I’m never going to stop doing everything I can to prove myself worthy of her, because I love her more than anything in this life. She deserves everything I can give her, and more.

Hell, I love her more than my own life. I would lay down mine for hers without thinking twice about it.

I lived in a dark place for a long time, and without knowing it, she dragged me back into the light. She changed me in a way no one else could. I can’t comprehend it. Whenever I try, it only confuses me more. At first I thought it was because of how I feel for her, but it’s not. Instead of letting the darkness overwhelm me, I focus on the sunlight in my soul– I find the better way. I may stumble, and I may fall, but I will always find my way back. Not because of her- because she left the light for me to follow. She’s my way home.

I couldn’t care less what anyone says or thinks because they don’t know what I know. What I’ve seen since the first moment I truly laid eyes on her. She has a heart as big as the world, and has more love to give than all of creation that I can only dream of giving back. But I would never stop trying, until I drew my last breath.

So yeah, I kinda love her, with all my heart. 

I know I have to close this door, but I really don’t want to.

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