Dating Your Intellectual Equal

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Sharing a connection on as many levels as possible is something that many people strive for when looking for their match in life. You’re not going to find perfect, but that doesn’t mean that you should have to settle. There’s no need to settle for someone that’s almost what you’re looking for, because when you do. you ultimately won’t be happy. You should get what you want in life, and in a partner. Isn’t that what happiness, and happily ever after is all about? This is why it’s imperative to know what you want when looking for a partner.


You need to have some idea of what you want, what works for you, and what doesn’t. We should be with the type of person that will add to our life. Many times people are looking for an intellectual connection specifically. I actually find this to be one of the most beautiful connections that one can share with their partner, right next to having a great musical connection. However, many times people want that intellectual connection with someone so badly and simply won’t settle for dating anyone that’s not their intellectual equal. 


It’s important to get what you want in life, and if being with your intellectual equal is something that’s imperative for you to have in a partner, then you need to focus on only dating intelligent people. There should be no issue down the line why a person isn’t your intellectual equal, despite the fact that they’re beautiful, have a great personality, and are warm and loving, etc., etc., etc. If you know what you want from the get-go, and you know that you’re not going to settle for less, then don’t. But don’t complain about it one day when your partner is everything to you except for one thing – they’re not your intellectual equal. 


When a person knows that it’s a priority and a definite requirement for them to be with someone that’s at their level intellectually, then they shouldn’t brush that requirement aside for any type of exterior beauty, or simply because the person has a good heart. This might sound a little off to many of you, but the truth is, if something is so important to someone now, and they don’t find that quality in the person, even if they’re okay with it in the beginning, at some point they’re going to feel that something is missing, and it’s likely not going to sit well with them. 


It’s important to make a list and write down about four must-haves that you need in a partner. You’re not going to find a perfect person or a perfect match for that matter. But when you have some idea of what you’re looking for in a person, and you write down a list of about four things that are must-haves, you’ll be more likely to look for those four things and then remain content with the rest of the things that might not be exactly as you’d wish. This isn’t settling by any means, because you’re getting those four essential qualities that you want in a person. You’re simply getting what you want because you know what you want.


If having an intellectual connection with someone is one of the most valuable things to you, then you should never have to settle for less. It’s important to feel connected to your partner in as many ways as possible. I’m not one to settle, and I’m not a fan of anyone else that does. Having said that, when we have a list of a few things that are essential for us to have in a partner, we’ll be much less likely to end up in a miserable situation, and one in which we ultimately feel unhappy. 


People don’t fall out of love when it’s real and when it’s right. The problem is usually that people end up with the wrong match, and never realize it until it’s too late. This is why it’s imperative to have those four things, and no, it doesn’t have to be exactly four, but I’m saying four to get the point across. We all need to have about four things that we really want in a partner, and those are the main things that we should be looking for in a match. We shouldn’t be going after perfect, but when we know the four essential things that are important to us to have, we’ll be less likely to waste our time or others’, and more likely to get what we want.

Anne Cohen
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