When the Perfect Relationship Falls Apart

when-the-perfect-relationship-falls-apart


I’d like to start out by saying that there is no perfect relationship. In this article, I’d like to go over some of the reasons why at times, the best of relationships fall apart, and may even come to an end. As well, I’d like to share a few tips to help those that are struggling in their relationships.


The good news is that if your relationship is based out of genuine love, the problems that you might have are almost always fixable. Having said that, good relationships take hard work. You can’t have a healthy and happy relationship if you’re not going to maintain it with love and effort. There are always things that you can do to improve your relationship. You just need to be willing to improve, and so does your partner.


Now the bad news is that no one likes to do the work. While early on, and during the honeymoon phase, the hard work might not seem like hard work, and you might even consider it pleasurable. But as time goes by, people tend to slowly change, give less, and even think more for themselves, and their own needs.


Relationships take two people that are both equally willing to put in an adequate amount of effort, love, time, and dedication into one another. It’s important to do things for one another not because you have to, but because you want to see your partner and your relationship thrive. No one wants to feel obligated to do anything in life. But if you want a healthy and happy relationship, you’re obligated to put in the hard work and effort that it’s going to take.


You can’t expect for anything to change in a relationship if you’re not going to maintain it. The more dedicated that you are, and the more love that you put into your relationship, the more that it’s going to thrive and succeed. Not to mention, the more that you’ll both be happy.


Healthy relationships involve a healthy balance of give-and-take, closeness, intimacy, honesty, healthy communication, being selfless, and appreciating each other not only for the big things, but for the little things as well. Another important thing to remember is not to make insignificant things such a big deal. Life is too short to waste time arguing about petty things. Pick and choose your battles.


Sometimes people get so comfortable being in a relationship with someone that they get so used to being around them, and they lose their filter, and their ability to hold back. They let down their guard (if they had one), which is a good thing, but many times, they just stop caring, and stop putting effort into things. They let go which is great but maybe at times they get a little too comfortable.


I definitely believe in being open book with your partner, and even being best friends if you will. But the comfort level that most relationships take on (or at least should take on with time) gets to a point where the couple stops being kind, or where they even snap at their partners for doing little things that may irritate them. Remember to be patient. Having patience can take your relationship to a whole other level. 


When we’re used to someone, we tend to forget that even the tone of our voice can change over time. In time, we lose a sense of being gentle with our words. This also pertains to the way that we communicate our thoughts and feelings to our partner. It’s important that we don’t forget to be kind and sweet to our loved one, and remain gentle with the way that we talk and listen to one another. This is a big part of having healthy communication which is one of the main and basic foundations that can maintain the happiness of a relationship.


Arguments are usually caused by couples having differences of opinions or by feeling as if their the one’s doing all of the work. Disagreements can also be derived by lacking any of the above mentioned things like good communication or intimacy, etc. It’s truly imperative to always work on maintaining your relationship. Developing good communication can definitely help out for most problems.


You should treat your partner better than you treated them when you met. But usually people tend to let go, care less, and put less effort and love into their partner, and their relationship over time. Remember, treat your partner better than you did when you first met, because you’ve likely gotten to know them better and are much more aware of what they like, what they don’t like, and if anything, it should be easier to please them.


Just remember not to become greedy or have unrealistic expectations. Many of our biggest downfalls in relationships is usually when we get so comfortable with our partner doing sweet gestures and things for us, that we start to expect those things. Remember moderation is key. The best method to live by is to expect less, and receive more.


With time, you should know your partner well, and when it’s right, your love for one another will change, but it will also grow into a better love with more substance and meaning than it had when you first met. This is when people should actually invest the most in their partner in every way – with love, effort, time, and with giving to one another. Great relationships take hard work, and that hard work is all about maintaining the love and happiness that you share.

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Anne Cohen

Founder, Owner, Writer, and Editor at Anne Cohen Writes
Anne Cohen is a lifestyle and relationship blogger based in Los Angeles, CA. Her blogs are Anne Cohen and Anne Cohen Writes. She contributes to various publications including The Huffington Post, Elite Daily, and many more. She's passionate about love, writing, chess, and more than anything, her two kids.
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