Are We Meant to Be?

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I believe in real love. You know, that soul mate type of love where you and one other person are destined to be together. I know, I know, I’m a pile of mush. Hate me for it, judge me for it, whatever. To each their own. I believe in “meant to be” as well. O.K., now some of you might really hate me! Do we all get to find our soulmates in this life? That I don’t know. Will we definitely know when we’re with our soulmate? Hmm, well, that I don’t know either. But what I do know, is that if we want to find a meaningful relationship that will be the closest thing to what soulmate love will feel like, we need to not only put effort, love, and hard work into a potential match, but we need to be open to finding him or her, and then maintaining that love with all of our might.


Do good things come to those who wait? Not always, no. Sometimes, waiting causes more damage than good. You see, opportunities in life come along all of the time. But great opportunities only happen once in awhile. It’s important to think wisely before making any big decisions in life. But sometimes, when we wait too long, we simply miss out, and end up being in a state of “only if I… You see, only if I did this or that, things would’ve been different. Only if I accepted the first offer or only if I wasn’t so stubborn… things would’ve been different. It’s important to think of all possible consequences in life before making big decisions. Live without regrets.


When it comes to finding that one special someone in life, looking for signs is cute and sweet and all, but in the real world, and not merely in fairytales, looking for “signs” is not enough to know whether or not you and someone are meant to be. And sure, we can create a beautiful life with someone, share our lives, our dreams, make families, and whatnot. But at the end of the day, we still won’t really know if we’re meant to be or not. Plain and simple, if you need signs to tell you if something is right or if you need some spiritual confirmation to send you a signal of “Hey you, down there, this is a sign that you’re good to go,” you’re simply setting yourself up for a long life of unhappiness.


I believe that if two people truly and utterly love and adore one another, and if they’re both willing to fight forward through the good and bad times in life as a team, a couple, as lovers, and as best friends, they’re meant to be. What’s meant to be is all about having the right kind of perspective. A positive perspective where two people are willing to give a situation their all. As long as two people truly love one another and both have the will to work on themselves and on their relationship for the long haul, they’ll make it through all of life’s challenges.


I’m not a big fan of articles that say that the fairytale type of love doesn’t exist. Not at all actually. You see, I believe it does exist, but it takes hard work, and an understanding that good things don’t come easy. Good things, or relationships I should say, take hard work, effort, being selfless, and putting your partner’s needs at times, before your own. If you believe in the possibility of finding your soulmate, then be willing to go after what you want, and to fight forward when things get tough.


Even the perfect love doesn’t involve perfection. It involves disagreements, hard times, moody days, ups, downs, twists, and turns. It involves a lot of hard work. I mean think about it, even in those fairy tales, nothing really ever runs smoothly, and it takes a lot of work in order to just get the girl, guy, Prince, or Princess. But just as well, we never really get to see what happens next, and just how much love, effort, and hard times that the supposed perfect match has to endure in order to maintain their relationship.


So the next time that you question as to whether or not you and someone you love are meant to be, ask yourself if you’re happier with that person or without them. Ask yourself if you’d miss them, if they were gone. And take a moment to think about the fact that it doesn’t really matter whether or not you’re meant to be, because the grass isn’t going to be greener if you’ve found true happiness with someone, and happiness is something that takes hard work and effort in order to maintain.


Make sure that you’re doing your share in your relationship. Keep the fire alive, be selfless, and focus on giving more than you receive. At the end of the day, if you and your partner love each other through all of life’s ups and downs, and you’re both willing to stick it out and fight forward despite any differences or hard times, you’re meant to be. Create your fairy tale life with your partner. We all have the power to brighten and create a beautiful life with someone, as long as it’s with someone who you love and one who feels the same way about what it takes to make a long term, happy life together.

Anne Cohen
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