As a parent, I can honestly say that I genuinely love and adore both of my children, and equally so. I love the fact that I view them as my best friends, and that they view me in the same manner. I recently saw a video that happened to be going viral on the Internet where this woman was talking about how you shouldn’t want or need your child to like you, and that they shouldn’t be your best friend.
She was saying how if your best friend is an eight-year-old, then you’re basically a loser, and that you should find friends your own age. Although this lady was quite attractive and very witty in her personality, I have to disagree with her. In this article I want to dig into this subject on a deeper level, and explain why I think the way that I do. There are many reasons why parents should have their kids as their best friends. There’s a difference between being a good parent and being a good parent that’s also your child’s best friend, and I hope to address both in this article.
When it comes to being a good mom or dad, you want your child to feel close to you to the point where they can confide in you in any way. Many times children struggle with telling their parents different things, because they’ll feel judgment or as if you might not approve. Having the comfort level of being able to tell your mom or dad anything is imperative if you want a healthy relationship with your child.
It’s important to build a foundation of great communication with your child that’s open to learning and growing from your child. As many other parents could probably tell you, you actually learn a lot from your child – despite how old they are. A lot of times in certain areas our children actually know way more than us as adults.
Being your child’s best friend and parent is definitely the way to go. Let me explain. First of all, if you’re a good parent, you should be able to separate the fact that you’re able to give rules and set limits, but also be close enough to your children that you can confide in them, and they can confide in you, yet still be able to discipline them when needed.
I share so much with my kids, and I do so on a level that many parents might disagree. Having said that, there are certain things that I don’t tell my children, because well, in a nutshell, somethings are just too much. But I have to say that on a daily basis, and especially before bedtime, I opened up to my children about my life and share with them what’s going on – including many details, because I value their opinions, and I even get advice from them – if you can believe that. I know, I know, I give advice being a relationship blogger, but at times I’ve gotten the best advice from my own children – which I find to be amazing!
I feel very fortunate that my children are my best friends, and it’s not a forced thing, because I know that the results are great by the way that they act for an 11 and 13-year-old. I’ve seen the difference between my children and other children that were raised in a different manner. As well, and in the most humblest way possible, I can tell you that my children share things with me that I know most other kids might not share with their parents, perhaps because of the fear of judgment, disapproval, or even disappointment.
But you see, and I’m not saying this in any sort of manipulative way, but when your child is able to talk to you on a deep level, they grow into much more open minded, loving, and accepting individuals. As well as the huge benefit of teaching them the importance of open and good communication, and how valuable it is in life.
So although I think it’s great to have other friends in my life that are my own age and any age really, I couldn’t possibly have found better best friends than my own children. I truly hope that when they grow up to be fine adults and human beings themselves, they’ll still value all of the love, light, and even discipline that I’ve taught them, and perhaps if I’m lucky enough, they’ll even want me to stay their best friend at that point.