Whether you’re single or in a relationship with someone that has let you down before, and perhaps many times before, it can take a toll on anyone after a while. We should all love ourselves enough, be a complete and whole person, and have a good and healthy self-esteem so that we don’t accept being treated poorly by others. No one should have to put up with bad treatment or accept being abused by anyone, despite how much we might love them.
I want to start off by saying that certain things like abuse and things of the sort are unforgivable, or at least, unforgettable on the most part. Depending on what someone does to you that you feel let down, and depending on how many times it’s happened, I always believe in forgiveness when someone is remorseful and truly sorry for what they’ve done to hurt you or disappoint you in any way. However, when someone doesn’t learn from their mistakes, or when they repeatedly let you down again, and again, despite their remorse, their apologetic ways, and despite promising to improve and not hurt you or let you down again, something needs to change.
No one should feel let down over, and over again by someone for any reason whatsoever. A healthy and happy relationship takes two people being kind, loving, giving, and considerate of one another. Relationships need a healthy balance of give-and-take, and they take a great deal of consideration from both people. One person in a relationship can’t consistently and repeatedly let the other person down all of the time without it causing great turbulence to the other person, and to their relationship.
Think about it. Why would you want to treat someone poorly and let them down over, and over again? Even more so, when you love and care for them deeply. Why would you want someone to do that to you? No one would, right? If someone accepts being treated poorly, accepts being abused (physically, mentally, verbally, or sexually), or even accepts the fact that their partner keeps messing up, and letting them down, again and again, it’s a big sign of a low self-esteem and weakness. Despite what some people might say, it’s not a sign of someone being a loving and forgiving person. But rather, it’s a sign of someone not sticking up for themselves, and putting up with bad treatment.
If you want to have a healthy and happy relationship, you need to call people out on their sh*t! and not put up with being treated poorly. If someone is letting you down or hurting you in any way, you need to stand up for yourself and speak your mind. You need to communicate your feelings to your partner and express how you’re not going to be okay with being treated in a way where you’re always being let down. If you don’t stand up for yourself, nothing’s going to change.
Once you’ve stood up for yourself, it’s important to feel heard, so hopefully, your partner will reflect what you’re saying, feel remorseful, and put effort into making the appropriate changes. Like I’ve said before, healthy and happy relationships take hard work and effort from both people. If you’re not going to communicate your feelings as you should, then your relationship won’t get very far, and definitely won’t improve.
For more serious cases:
If your situation involves abuse in any way, you can alway reach out to authorities, and remember NEVER BE AFRAID TO TELL someone, and ask for help. Even if someone threatens you. If someone is hurting you and you’re afraid to tell anyone, nothing will change, because no one will know what’s going on. Never fear to let someone know that you need help. Remember, you’re never alone, and no one is aloud to hurt, abuse, or take advantage of you. If you need to, reach out to me personally, and I will direct you to the right person to talk to if your case is serious enough. My best and my blessings for a great rest of your day. G-d Bless.