Many times, people don’t seem to handle dealing with their own problems, and many times, their own emotions as well. At least, not how they should. Some people will try to force their negativity down other’s throats by making them listen to them. But the truth is, no one can force you to listen, if you really know when to say, “no,” and when to simply walk away.
Many people explore relationships with others who they end up finding out shortly after, are very negative people, who carry a lot of baggage, negativity, and all-around toxic qualities. However, we need to remember that we can’t control others, but we can control how much we’re willing to take from others, and just how much we’re willing to put up with before we blow our lid. And in reality, we don’t really have to get upset, be angry, or get to the point of blowing our lid, and having our day be ruined, because of what someone else said or did.
You see, at the end of the day, it’s not really about what someone else said or did, but more so, it’s whether we let what they said or did control our emotions, put us in a bad mood, and ruin our day. We don’t have to react to people when they’re toxic or negative, we don’t have to listen to them vent their issues or spew their negativity onto us. And despite whether they’re intentionally or unintentionally trying to hurt you with what they say or how they act, we don’t need to be someone’s saviour.
We have the ability to walk away and leave a conversation when we see it’s going South. No one is holding a gun to your head, no one is forcing you to listen, and no one is forcing you to read those constant text messages that you might be getting.
People can only take away your happiness as much as you let them. As well, if you desire to be in a place of Zen and peace, and you’re striving hard to improve yourself, striving towards your goals, and improving your life as much as humanly possible, then you need to let go of the toxic people in your life. The only way to have great success, to strive towards enlightenment, and to truly be the best version of yourself, is to surround yourself with like-minded individuals who are also trying to do the same.
Just because we might be having a bad day, it doesn’t give us the right or the power to take others down with us. And if we’re not careful, considerate, and self aware enough, we might end up giving our bad day to other people with our expressions, by the tone of our voices, and with what we say, and how we act. I think that most of us in this world do this on a daily basis. But then again, a lot of people work hard on being a better person, and they try to be aware of when they’re in a bad mood or having a bad day so that they don’t react or give other people their negative energy.
Another thing that many people do which they should work on, is instead of owning up to their issues, their mistakes, or admitting fault at times to the wrong things that they’ve done to others, they project, and they blame. They’ll find reasons to blame others for why they’re having a bad day, for why they have to deal with certain consequences that they feel that they don’t deserve, or for why their life is the way that it is.
Many people will try to put their issues onto you, as if you’re the one with the problem. Some people do this intentionally and on a very intentional and conscious level, but some people do this unintentionally, and on an unconscious level. But either way, projecting issues is not only hurtful to others and wrong, but it will keep you from improving your issues, and becoming a better person.
We need to deal with our own issues in life. And we need to do so, instead of sweeping our issues under the rug, projecting them onto others, or by remaining in denial as if we’re “perfect people.” I mean come on! Who is perfect? I mean, other than me of course.
But seriously, if we don’t own up to our issues, and if we don’t admit to our mistakes, then we’ll never learn and grow from them. We need to acknowledge the things that we’ve done wrong, the bad choices that we’ve made, and why we have to deal with consequences, and even why our emotions might be a total mess at times. Blaming others won’t make us into better people, and it definitely won’t solve our issues.
We’re responsible for facing, and dealing with consequences from our own actions. We have choices in life, and we can either think carefully, and choose good over evil, or we can be careless, reckless, quick to jump, and make bad decisions without thinking. But we have free will to decide things for ourselves. This is why we need to own up to our mistakes, admit to our wrongdoings, apologize to others when we’ve done something wrong, show remorse, and genuinely feel it, and deep enough so that we can learn and grow from our mistakes.
At the end of the day, we’re all human, and we all make mistakes. But what’s important is to learn from our mistakes, to grow, and to improve ourselves, without becoming so arrogant, thinking that life will change its ways or that others are the ones with the issues and that they need to change. We need to own up to the fact that we are all imperfect. As well, we need to own up to the fact that it takes a lot of hard work, biting our tongues at times, and slapping a smile across our faces, even when it might seem hard to do.
How we act, what we say, and the choices that we make in life will not only affect us at times, but they will affect others around us. Therefore, think before you act, and think before you speak. Try to improve yourself on a daily basis. And be self-aware enough to realize that maybe the issues are yours. So own up to your mistakes, try not to repeat them, and try to be apologetic and remorseful for your wrong doings.
And last but not least, slap a smile across your face, because the expression on our faces can help brighten our own spirits, but it can also have the power to change another person’s mood for the better. When we smile, it can bring hope, positive energy, and optimism. Remember that, so that the next time that you’re feeling down or in a bad mood, you’ll remember that simply changing the expression on your face can do wonders to bring more light and peace into your life, and possibly even to others.
Latest posts by Anne Cohen (see all)
- When People Treat You Like One of Many, Instead of One in a Million - September 20, 2017
- When They Say That It’s About the Person, Not the Place – They’re Right - September 18, 2017
- The Do’s and Don’ts of Online Dating 2017-2018 - September 9, 2017